An important component communicative communication is ability to ask questions.
Questions are a way to obtain information and at the same time a way to switch the thoughts of the person with whom you are talking in the right direction (whoever asks questions controls the conversation).
With the help of questions, we build a bridge for ourselves into the unknown and uncertain. And since uncertainty and the unknown are a characteristic feature of the modern, rapidly changing world, developing the ability to ask questions is very relevant.
“Sorry for the misunderstanding, I didn’t understand you correctly” is a phrase that can often be heard in conversations between people. So, so that you don’t have to say it, learn to ask questions correctly. A correctly posed question, allowing you to find out your partner’s intentions, helps to avoid misunderstandings and conflicts. After all, sometimes, neglecting the opportunity to ask a question, or not asking it at the right time, we open the way to guesses and conjectures, various speculative constructions, create the wrong impression about others, attributing to them non-existent qualities, advantages and disadvantages, which often leads to misunderstandings and conflicts .
No matter who you are, a leader or an ordinary manager, a coach or a psychologist, in any area of life you will need the ability to ask questions correctly. In any conversation, both business and personal, the right questions help:
- Show interest in the personality of the partner and interlocutor;
- Ensure “mutuality,” that is, make your value system understandable to your interlocutor, while simultaneously clarifying his system;
- Receive information, express doubts, show your own position, show trust, be interested in what is being said, show condescension and show that you are ready to devote the necessary time to the conversation;
- Seize and maintain the initiative in communication;
- Change the conversation to another topic;
- Move from the interlocutor’s monologue to dialogue with him.
To learn how to ask questions correctly, you need to pay attention to the correct construction of internal dialogue and study the main types of questions in external dialogue.
INTERNAL DIALOGUE(questions to yourself) organizes our own thinking and helps us formulate thoughts. The relevance and quality, precision and consistency of the questions that arise in our minds greatly influence the effectiveness of most of the actions we take.
In order to organize an internal dialogue, you need to understand that its purpose is to analyze any of the problems. A set of relevant questions will help to comprehensively analyze any problem (situation). There are two options for questions.
The first option is seven classic questions:
What? Where? When? Who? How? Why? By what means?
These seven questions allow you to cover the entire problem situation and perform its verbal and logical analysis.
The second option for analyzing the situation is a set of six questions:
- Facts - What facts and events are relevant to the situation in question?
- Feelings - How do I generally feel about this situation? How do others supposedly feel?
- Desires - What do I really want? What do others want?
- Obstacles - What is stopping me? What is stopping others?
- Time - What should be done and when?
- Tools - What tools do I have to solve this problem? What means do others have?
Use any of the two options when organizing an internal dialogue. When a problem arises, analyze the situation by asking yourself questions, bring your thoughts to clarity, and only then begin to act.
Importance and significance EXTERNAL DIALOGUE, is asking the right questions, which are much better than a monotonous monologue. After all, the one who asks is the leader in the conversation. Also, with the help of questions, we show the interlocutor our interest in the conversation and in deepening it. By asking, we express to the person our desire to establish a good relationship with him. But all this happens when the conversation does not resemble or look like an interrogation.
Therefore, before you start a conversation or business conversation, prepare a series of questions for your interlocutor, and ask them as soon as you move on to the business part of the conversation (in a normal conversation, as soon as you touch on the topic you need). This will give you a psychological advantage.
Questions of external dialogue can be posed in specific forms and are of the following types:
Closed questions. The purpose of closed questions is to obtain an unambiguous answer (the agreement or refusal of the interlocutor), “yes” or “no”. Such questions are good only when it is necessary to clearly and clearly determine the presence of something in the present, past, and sometimes in the future (“Are you using this?”, “Have you used this?”, “Do you want to try?”), or attitude towards something (“Did you like it?”, “Are you satisfied with this?”) in order to understand how to proceed. Closed questions (and yes or no answers) shift our efforts in a specific direction.
You should not immediately push a person by asking such questions to make a final decision. Remember that it is easier to convince than to convince.
It's another matter when you deliberately ask a closed question, which is difficult to answer with a negative. For example, referring to generally accepted values (Socrates often used a similar method): “Do you agree, life does not stand still?”, “Tell me, is quality and guarantees important to you?” Why is this done: the more often a person agrees with us, the wider the zone of mutual understanding (this is one of ways of manipulation). And vice versa, if you can’t pick up correct question, and often hear “no” in response to leading questions, the likelihood of your proposal being rejected as a whole increases. Therefore, achieve agreement on small things, do not start the conversation with contradictions, then it will be easier to achieve the desired result.
Open questions. They do not imply a definite answer, make a person think, and better reveal his attitude to your proposal. Open questions are good way obtaining new, detailed information that is very difficult to obtain using closed questions. Consequently, in conversation it is necessary to use open questions more often, in their various variations.
Ask for facts that will help you understand the situation: “What is available?”, “How much?”, “How is it decided?”, “Who?” etc.
Find out the interests of your interlocutor and the conditions for satisfying them.
Find out your interlocutor’s attitude to the situation under discussion: “What do you think about this?”, “How do you feel about this?”
Suggest, in the form of questions, another (your) solution to the problem: “Can we do it this way..?”, “Why don’t we pay attention to such and such an option..?”, while arguing your proposal. This is much better than openly saying: “I propose...”, “Let’s do it better this way...”, “I think...”.
Be interested in what your interlocutor’s statement is based on: “Where are you coming from?”, “Why exactly?”, “What is the reason for this?”
Clarify everything that is unclear to you: “What (how) exactly?”, “What exactly..?”, “Because of what?”.
Find out unaccounted for points, both personal and business: “What did we forget?”, “What issue did we not discuss?”, “What was missed?”,
If there are doubts, clarify their reasons: “What’s stopping you?”, “What worries you (doesn’t suit you)?”, “What is the reason for the doubts?”, “Why is this unrealistic?”
Characteristics of open questions:
- Activation of the interlocutor, such questions force him to think about the answers and express them;
- The partner, at his own discretion, chooses what information and arguments to present to us;
- With an open question, we bring the interlocutor out of a state of restraint and isolation and eliminate possible barriers to communication;
- The partner becomes a source of information, ideas and suggestions.
Since, when answering open questions, the interlocutor has the opportunity to avoid a specific answer, divert the conversation aside, or share only information that is beneficial to him, it is recommended to ask basic and secondary, clarifying and leading questions.
Main questions– are planned in advance, can be either open or closed.
Secondary or follow-up questions- spontaneous or planned, they are asked to clarify already stated answers to basic questions.
Clarifying questions require short and concise answers. They are asked in case of doubt in order to clarify the nuances. People are almost always willing to delve into the details and nuances of their affairs, so there is no problem here. Unless we ourselves often neglect to ask clarifying questions, while our interlocutors are just waiting for this from us in order to make sure that we have understood everything correctly. Don't be shy and don't forget to ask clarifying questions!
Suggestive questions These are questions whose content makes a certain answer obvious, i.e. are formulated in such a way as to tell a person what he should say. It is recommended to ask leading questions when you are dealing with timid and indecisive people, to summarize the conversation, or if the interlocutor has started talking and you need to return the conversation to the right (business) direction, or if you need to confirm the correctness of your judgment (belief in the profitability of your proposal) .
Leading questions sound extremely intrusive. They almost force the interlocutor to admit the correctness of your judgments and agree with you. Therefore, they must be used extremely carefully.
In order to know how to ask questions correctly, you need to have an idea of all kinds of these issues. Using questions of all types in business and personal conversations allows you to achieve various goals. Let's look at the main types of questions:
Rhetorical questions are asked in order to evoke the desired reaction in people (to gain support, to focus attention, to point out unresolved problems) and do not require a direct answer. Such questions also enhance the character and feelings in the speaker’s sentence, making the text richer and more emotional. Example: “When will people finally learn to understand each other?”, “Can what happened be considered a normal phenomenon?”
Rhetorical questions must be formulated in such a way that they sound short and concise, relevant and understandable. Silence in response serves as approval and understanding here.
Provocative questions are asked with the aim of causing a storm of emotions in the interlocutor (opponent), so that the person, in a fit of passion, reveals hidden information or blurts out something unnecessary. These are provocative questions clean water manipulative influence, but sometimes it is also necessary for the benefit of the matter. Just don’t forget, before asking such a question, to calculate all the risks associated with it. After all, by asking provocative questions you are to some extent challenging.
Confusing questions transfer attention to the area of interest of the questioner, which lies aside from the main direction of the conversation. Such questions are asked either unintentionally (if you are interested in the topic of conversation, you should not ask about things that have nothing to do with it) or deliberately out of a desire to solve some of your own problems, to direct the conversation in the direction you need. If, in response to your confusing question, the interlocutor asks you not to be distracted from the topic under discussion, do so, but note that you want to consider and discuss the topic you stated at another time.
Also, confusing questions are asked with the aim of simply avoiding the topic of conversation, either because it is not interesting (if you value communication with this person, you should not do this), or it is inconvenient.
Relay questions- are aimed at being proactive and require the ability to grasp your partner’s cues on the fly and provoke him to further reveal his position. For example: “Do you mean by this that...”.
Questions to demonstrate your knowledge. Their goal is to show off their own erudition and competence in front of other participants in the conversation, and to earn the respect of their partner. This is a kind of self-affirmation. When asking such questions, you need to be truly, and not superficially, competent. Because you yourself may be asked to give a detailed answer to your own question.
Mirror question contains part of a statement spoken by the interlocutor. It is asked that a person see his statement from the other side, this helps to optimize the dialogue, give it genuine meaning and openness. For example, to the phrase “ Never assign this to me again!", the question follows - " Shouldn't I instruct you? Is there anyone else who could handle this just as well?»
The question “Why?”, applied in this case, would cause a defensive reaction, in the form of excuses, justifications and the search for imaginary reasons, and could even end in accusations and lead to conflict. The mirror question gives a much better result.
Alternative question is asked in the form of an open question, but contains several answer options. For example: “Why did you choose the profession of an engineer: deliberately, followed in the footsteps of your parents, or decided to enroll for a campaign, together with a friend, or maybe you yourself don’t know why?” Alternative questions are asked to activate the taciturn interlocutor.
A question that fills the silence. good the right question You can fill an awkward pause that sometimes arises in a conversation.
Calming Questions have a noticeable calming effect in difficult situations. You should be familiar with them if you have small children. If they are upset about something, you can distract them and calm them down by asking a few questions. This technique works immediately, because you have to answer questions, thereby being distracted. You can calm an adult in the same way.
Requires compliance with the following rules:
Brevity is the soul of wit. The question should be short, precise and clear. This increases the likelihood of a response to it. When you start complex, lengthy arguments, go far from the topic, you may even forget what exactly you wanted to ask about. And your interlocutor, while you are posing your question for five minutes, is wondering what exactly you want to ask him about. And it may happen that the question remains unheard or misunderstood. If you really want to come from afar, let the explanation (backstory) be heard first, and then a clear and short question.
So that after your questions your interlocutor does not have the feeling that he is under interrogation, soften them in intonation. The tone of your question should not show that you are demanding an answer (of course, unless this is a situation where you have no other choice), it should sound in a relaxed manner. Sometimes it will be right to ask the person you are talking to, ask permission - “Can I ask you a few questions to clarify?”
The ability to ask questions is inextricably linked with the ability to listen to your interlocutor. People are very responsive to those who listen to them carefully. And they will treat your question with the same degree of care. It is also important not only to show your culture and interest, but also not to miss information that may serve as a reason for clarifying questions or for adjusting what has already been prepared.
Most people, for various reasons, are not ready to answer direct questions (some have difficulty in presenting, others are afraid to convey incorrect information, some do not know the subject well enough, others are limited by personal or corporate ethics, the reason may be reticence or shyness, etc. . P.). In order for a person to give you an answer no matter what, you need to interest him, explain to him that answering your questions is in his interests.
You shouldn’t ask a question that starts with the words: “How could you...?” or “Why don’t you...?” Correct question This is a request for information, but not as a hidden accusation. When the situation requires you to express dissatisfaction with your partner’s actions, it is better to firmly but tactfully tell him about it in an affirmative form, rather than in the form of a question.
So, having learned how to ask questions correctly, you can get the (professional) information you need from your interlocutor, understand and get to know him better, find out his position and motives for his actions, make your relationship with him more sincere and trusting (friendly), encourage further cooperation, and also discover weaknesses and give he has the opportunity to figure out what he is wrong about. It’s clear why psychologists often talk about art rather than ability to ask questions.
If you find an error, please highlight a piece of text and click Ctrl+Enter.
The quality of the answer depends not only on who we ask the question to, but also on how we ask it. If you ask the wrong question, you are almost guaranteed to get the wrong answer. The right questions significantly increase the chances of getting advice and useful information. Let's try to figure out what needs to be done for this.
5 mistakes of the questioner
1. Ask a question that already contains the answer
Very often the person asking has his own version of the answer, and he wants to check it. In this case, it is important that the question does not contain any indication of the “correct” answer. Examples of such questions: “Do we really need to take on this order?”, “I think it will work, do you think so too?”, “You agree that it will work?” and so on. When a question is addressed from a superior to a subordinate, the likelihood of receiving the desired answer increases many times over. If you really want to know the opinion of your interlocutor, and not just decided to share it with him, do not make it clear that you are only waiting for his approval.
2. Ask a closed question
Closed questions are those that have a limited number of answer options. Typically two or three. The most famous example is Shakespeare's “to be or not to be.” If you are not Shakespeare, you should not force the answerer into a framework. It is quite possible that there are many more possibilities beyond. A simple example: your boss puts a burden on you extra work. “Agree or refuse?” - you ask your friend, thereby missing the option “Agree, but for a salary increase.”
3. Pretend you understand the answer even though you don’t.
Not all answers are equally clear. An unclear answer is useless. If you are not sure that you understood your interlocutor, you should not hide this fact. Managers are often afraid to ask for clarification because it allegedly demonstrates their incompetence. Meanwhile, former General Electric CEO Jack Welch, in his book Winning, argues that leaders should ask the most questions and their questions should be the best.
4. Put pressure on the respondent
“What the hell is going on with your project?” “Are you even going to work?”, “What kind of nonsense are you showing me?” - in all these cases, the questioner will receive only . If your goal is to get the employee to admit guilt, then you are doing everything right. If the goal is to understand the problem, then putting pressure on the respondent will only hurt. Business consultant Michael Marquardt writes that when people defend themselves, they tend to view themselves as part of the problem rather than as a source of possible solutions.
wittaya2499/Depositphotos.com5. Ask a whole series of questions
This method is so good that it is used deliberately when they do not want to hear the answer. Just ask your interlocutor a lot of questions in a row, preferably interrupting him. That's all. It, and you will not receive an answer to any of the questions.
Asking the right questions eliminates the need to know all the answers.
Donald Peterson, Ford CEO (1985–1989)
5 good ideas for asking the right questions
1. Prepare
If you are having a conversation where you will ask important questions, it makes sense to prepare in advance: determine the essence of the problem and the purpose of the conversation, sketch out a list of questions.
2. Formulate the question in one sentence
Business consultant Jeff Haden suggests using this technique to get rid of “hints” in questions. Plus, short questions tend to be more understandable. By trying to fit it into one sentence, you yourself will better understand the essence of the problem.
3. Formulate several options for the question
During the preparation process, it is advisable to select several options for the same question. This will allow you to look at the problem from different angles. It can be useful to set the same one for different time periods. For example, not “What can be done to increase sales?”, but “What can be done to increase sales in the next month?”
eteimaging/Depositphotos.com 4. Start questions with “why”
Such questions are aimed at identifying the cause. “Why” softens directive questions very well. For example, instead of “You still haven’t submitted the project. What's happening?" It’s better to ask “Why can’t you deliver the project on time?” There is even a special technique for identifying hidden causes -.
5. Ask clarifying questions
Among the important questions, there are few that require a short, clear and single answer. Much more often we are faced with problems for which there are many possible solutions, and the consequences are difficult to assess. Somewhat consistently questions asked, each of which develops and refines the previous one, allow you to obtain deeper and more useful answers. If a question becomes a reason for dialogue, discussion, discussion, it is a good question.
For most people, asking questions is as natural as walking or eating. They don’t think about whether they are doing it well or poorly. But if the answer depends on the correct answer, it makes sense to work on the quality of the questions. Do you use any special techniques to ask good questions?
Thanks to lessons 8 and 20, you are already familiar with question words and can ask questions in different tenses. Today's lesson is about how to ask questions to the subject.
Question words who and what
The subject is the main member of the sentence, indicating the person or thing performing the action. When you ask a question to a subject, the question words Who and What are used. The word order with them remains exactly the same as in a positive sentence. And most importantly, no auxiliary verbs. For example:
Sam is talking to Katy. — Who is talking to Katy?
The accident happened yesterday. — What happened yesterday?
He can do it. — Who can do it?
The interrogative words Who and What are used when we ask a question to a complement (answers questions in oblique cases). In this case, you will need auxiliary verbs:
Sam is talking to Katy. — Who is Sam talking to?
They bought a new car yesterday. — What did they buy?
He can do it. — What can he do?
Important! Pay attention to the use of prepositions in questions!
The words what and who agree with a singular verb, so remember to add the ending “s” to the predicate in a subject question, for example:
They speak Spanish. — Who speak s Spanish?
Question words which, whose, how many and how much
The interrogative words which, whose, how many and how much can also build a question to the subject. In this case, they must be used together with a noun:
The bedroom has two windows. — Which room has two windows?
Tom's dog is playing in the garden. — Whose dog is playing in the garden?
A lot of people live here. — How many people live here?
Some money has been paid. — How much money has been paid?
If you use these question words to ask a question to the complement, you will need auxiliary verbs:
I will choose Room 7. — Which room will you choose?
Ruth is walking Tom's dog. — Whose dog is Ruth walking?
I asked a few people. — How many people did you ask?
I paid some money. — How much money did you pay?
Lesson assignments
Task 1. Ask a question to the subject using who, what, which, whose, how many or how much.
- These flowers look wonderful.
- So many people call here every day.
- My brother works in the Zoo.
- Rachel is coming to see us.
- Mum's bag is in the car.
- Red house is the biggest.
- Miss Morstan will go to Paris.
- The flight has been delayed.
Task 2. Ask a question about the highlighted word.
The Russian language is on the list of the most difficult languages. It has several cases and tenses, a unique sentence structure and many parts of speeches that may seem simply “magical” to foreigners.
Also in primary school, students go through the topic “Words that cannot be questioned.” Consideration of this paragraph takes place in the second grade, when students study parts of speech.
Parts of speech of the Russian language:
1. Noun. It confirms the answers to questions about the subject.
2. Adjective. It is responsible for the qualitative component of the object, its properties.
3. Verb. He is responsible for the actions of objects.
4. Pronoun. This is a part of speech that shows us objects and their quantity. But he doesn’t say the title or name.
5. Numerals. They count objects, years.
All these parts of speech are independent, that is, you can ask a question about them, they do not depend on each other. Sentences are made from these parts of speech. They may not be included in the sentences all together, but from each of them it is built.
In addition, in the Russian language there are a number of words (parts of speech) that cannot exist on their own. They do not “know how” to construct sentences, but only complement them. They give them a secondary coloring, for example, they express emotions or indicate the place or affiliation of an object.
Words that cannot be asked questions:
· Interjections.
· Prepositions.
· Particles.
Pretext is a particle of speech that is dependent (functional). It links words together in a sentence or phrase. Prepositions are not used by themselves.
They can be simple, derived and compound. Examples:
Simple prepositions: We went outside with my brother.
Compound prepositions: The mouse crawled out from under the floor.
Derivative prepositions: In the course of time he came to the pier.
Union– a dependent part of speech that connects several sentences in one. As a rule, conjunctions are used in complex sentences.
Types of this functional part of speech:
Coordinating and subordinating conjunctions: He was a very handsome boy, but his character was disgusting.
To them, just like to a preposition, you cannot ask a specific question.
Particles- add some color to sentences or serve for word formation. Types of particles:
1) Formative non-independent parts of speech. They create new forms of words.
2) Negative particles.
3) Particles showing a condition or sign.
4) Modal particles.
Examples: This is exactly what my mother was thinking about when she sewed buttons on her coat.
Aren't you interested in knowing the result?
No need for unnecessary phrases.
Interjections- words or phrases that are necessary to express emotions, pointing to them, but not naming them.
Thanks to this part of speech, you can show any emotion in a sentence. For example, to show that a person is very surprised, but without using the word surprise itself.
With the help of interjections, you can clearly indicate what a person is experiencing at the moment, it can be anger, pain, joy, confusion.
Goals:
- teach you to ask questions who? What? to words denoting objects;
- develop spelling vigilance, educational and intellectual skills (compare, establish similarities and differences, draw conclusions);
- cultivate relationships of business cooperation and interest in the subject.
Equipment: turntables (Bazarny technology).
Organizing time
The lesson begins with a greeting and a psychological mood for work.
It's a sad time! Ouch charm!
I am pleased with your farewell beauty.
I love the lush decay of nature,
Forests dressed in scarlet and gold.
What time is being talked about in the excerpt of A. S. Pushkin’s poem?
- Right. And Autumn came to visit us for class. She brought you each bouquets of autumn leaves. They're not sparkling with fall colors yet, but you can dress them up. Answer the teacher's question, color the sheet. At the end of the lesson, we'll see what bouquets you got. And for them to turn out beautiful, for this you need to be active and attentive in class.
Calligraphy
Guess the riddle:
Autumn has come to our garden,
The red torch was lit.
Here are blackbirds and starlings scurrying about
And, noisily, they peck at him. (Rowan)
- Look at the words: rowan, mountain ash, rowan, rowan.
- What do these words have in common? (Similar, related)
- Find the extra word? (Rowan)
- Why?
- What is the first sound heard in the word rowan?
- Describe this sound.
- How is the sound R indicated in writing?
- What elements does the letter P and r consist of?
- Notebook entry: R r rrr ra re rowan
Vocabulary work
Words: b.reza, l.sitsa, za.ts, r.bina, s.b aka. (On turntables)
- Read the words.
- What common?
- What groups can these words be divided into?
- Which word may be superfluous and for what reason?
- Write it off. Identify the missing spelling.
- Peer review.
Exercise for the eyes
New material
1. Listen to the lines from the poem by A. Barto:
Who, who
Does he live in this room?
Who, who
Does it rise with the sun?
- Choose the words that could answer these questions.
(Cat, aquarium, Mashenka, ray, ball) - Prove your choice.
- It turns out that it is very important to be able to ask the question correctly.
This is what we will learn in this lesson.
2. Exercises in asking questions: who? What? to the words.
Write on the board: Who is this? What is this?
And the words “scattered” throughout the class. Collect words that answer the questions who? What? and distribute into columns. (Doll, spoon, fish, fell, candle, bright, water, vase, loud, strong, stomps, elephant, wolf, candy, crow, grandmother)
- What is another name for words distributed in columns?
- Write down words consisting of one syllable and three syllables.
Conclusion: What do you need to know when asking questions about words?
3. Working with the textbook.
Exercise No. 57 (with commentary).
Consolidation
Physical exercise (to music)
Golden leaves swirled
In the pinkish water of the pond,
Like a light flock of butterflies
Freezingly, he flies towards the star.
- Guys, it’s leaf fall in our class. (Leaflets with words)
- Words can not only be divided into animate and inanimate, but also combined into thematic groups.
- Combine the words into thematic groups.
- What question does each group's words answer?
- Write down 4 words:
1 option- words that answer the question what?
Option 2- words that answer the question who?
Conclusion:
- What words answer the question who?
- What words answer the question what?
Working with cards
- Read it.
- What is this: text or a set of sentences?
- Prove it.
1 option– write down words that answer the question who?
Option 2- write down words that answer the question what?
Game “Magic Transformations”
Words: braid, poppy, drop, dream.
- What question would you ask about these words?
- Replace 1 letter in the words so that these words answer the question who? (Goat, crayfish, heron, catfish)
- Write it off.
Lesson summary
Solve a crossword puzzle (work in groups)
- What word did you get?
- What words represent the object?
- What do you need to know when asking questions? What?
- Show off your fall bouquets. They glow with different autumn colors. It means you worked well, you were in a good working mood.
- Seventy clothes and all without fasteners.
- Himself scarlet, sugar
The caftan is green, velvet. - Came without paints and without a brush
And repainted all the leaves. - He walked and walked and disappeared into the ground.
They're calling me, they're waiting
And when I come, they hide from me. - The girl is sitting in prison, and the scythe is on the street.
- Housewife
Flies over the lawn
He will fuss over the flower,
He will share the honey. - Falling from a branch
Gold coins